Anxiously “A-Weighting” the Holidays 2001
by Robin Peglow, M.A., H.H.C.



Ahh, the holidays. Smiling, we breathe a sigh of relief, “Finally Thanksgiving is here! I thought it would never come. It is so relaxing for me”. Right? Or is it more like, “Thanksgiving?! It’s here already? Then Christmas, Hannukah — they are here too! I’m not ready!” Unless you are a child awaiting the coolest new toy of the season, chances are your thoughts center on money, your not-so-favorite in-laws you’ll see for days at a time, cramming to complete projects before vacation, fear of gaining weight, etc. The holidays can be overwhelming, create anxiety and weigh you down on many levels. Make this year different. Follow these tips to create the best season yet!

Purpose
What are the holidays about for you? For everyone it is different, but in essence our holidays are about celebration, family, appreciation or honoring a significant historical or religious event. Tradition is important, however don’t let tradition supercede purpose. Purpose first, tradition second.

Priorities
What are your priorities? What are your family’s priorities? Do you feel stressed, exhausted, and crave for the holidays to be over before they even begin? If so, it is time to reevaluate. Just because you have “always” done something a certain way doesn’t mean you must continue doing it. Be innovative and do what’s right for you and your family. People often desire consistency for the “feel” of a holiday, so strike a balance of new and old based on your priorities.

Eliminate, Change or Accept
Create a list of concerns and stresses that relate to the holidays. (You can do this for yourself and as a family.) See which stresses can be eliminated entirely, which tasks can be delegated to someone else, which can be modified or simplified. There will be some things that simply are and cannot be changed. Accept them, release them and focus on to what you can do.

Involve Others in the Changes
Once you identify your concerns and potential changes, ask for the help and support of others. Let them know what you are doing and ask for input on how the holiday might be done differently. (Note, there are times when this won’t work and you simply have to say, “In order for me to truly enjoy this holiday, this is what I am doing.” Period.)

Plan Ahead
For the smoothest transition to new traditions, plan ahead. People need time to get used to change and prepare to do things in a different way. Part of the reason we fall into traditions is because they are also habits!

Explore New “Traditional” Foods and Recipes
People often associate the holidays with gaining weight. This does not have to be, nor do you have to sit around eating carrot and celery sticks while daydreaming about a scrumptious turkey dinner. By simply eating a free-range turkey, you eliminate added preservatives and hormones; often it is more tender and moist! (Or for the Vegetarians, try a Tofurkey, a tofu turkey!) Replace some butter here, salt there, sugar there and you will still have fantastic tasting, traditional dishes. (A tip, share ingredients substitutions after the meal to avoid biases.) Explore your local bookstore/ library or the Internet for meal ideas and food substitutes. You can maintain your weight, have more energy and say goodbye to feeling guilty!

Eliminate Obligatory Events and Gestures
This is sticky, but in the end you can’t please everyone, so honor yourself and your family. Let’s face it, we are not in a perfect world –we don’t all get along. If forgiving and forgetting is impossible, reevaluate your attendance or attend to that relationship. Do you have to go just because you’ve always gone? Must you drain your savings for gift giving? NO! Is a gift out of obligation really a gift? Back to your priorities and your purpose.

Living Intentionally
Be intentional about your gifts, the events you attend, the events you offer. If it feels too complicated, simplify! The only way you are going to get the most out of this holiday season is if you feel empowered to make it really special. Create new traditions, ones that are really meaningful to you and that suit who you are now. Our lives are very different today than they were 50 or 100 years ago, give yourself permission to live in the present.

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