Giving Your Gifts
To Give Freely or to Withhold?
October 2006

Every day there are innumerable choices to be made.  Whether to get out of bed, what to eat, what to wear, how to spend your time.  Did you ever consider that it is your choice to either withhold your gifts, or share them in the course of a day?

Recently an early season cold snuck up on me.  Then I got a terrible night’s sleep compounding my symptoms and robbing me of the high energy I’m accustomed to.  I was cranky and irritated that my neighbor was pacing with heavy steps until midnight, and that another neighbor who was moving out had left 4 dogs unattended, leaving them to bark all night long.  And then I had to get up at 5:30am after barely sleeping through all the pacing, barking and sneezing!  I had plenty of reasons to be edgy and grumpy.

And then I arrived to teach my yoga class.  Suddenly I was faced with a choice.  Would I give my gifts or sit in my inner grump?  Essentially I could either offer a low energy “I’m-so-tired class,” or I could offer energy and uplift.  And so I dropped the grump and let my reserve of inspiration rise up and override irritation.

We all have the ability to contribute to or take away from the lives of others.  Which do you choose?

Leveraging  your gifts
In the course of a day, each of us has different gifts to share.  It might be a simple hello, smile, a hug, or pat on the back.  It might be delivering an expertly written report or singing a special song to your child, or complimenting a loved one.  You have these gifts for a reason.   And they matter.  They make a difference to that person, that day.  Will you withhold them or share?

Giving  for the sake of giving
Often times we wonder, “what’s in it for me?”  We can hardly help ourselves thinking this way, with tight schedules, struggling for time to grocery shop much less to give to others.  We can easily lose sight of the fact that if we were meant to live in extreme independence and isolation, we wouldn’t live among thousands of people, in community.  Only one part of life is about being individually successful.  Another part is contributing to the success and upliftment of others in collaboration.

This need not be a huge, monumental influence, where you’re a national icon; it might simply be opening a door for someone, sincerely listening to a friend, offering encouragement, or raking an elderly neighbor’s yard.  When you give because you can, because you want to, not because you expect to “get” something in return, you receive far more than you could hold in both hands.  A little piece of your heart gets filled up and your world expands with a broader view.

Giving  when you don’t want to
There will be woe-is-me days that leave you begrudgingly dragging yourself out of bed when you’d rather not give.  Or you will be in the midst of a group who needs a skill or gift that you have, and you’re afraid to speak up, lest you fail or it doesn’t work out.  In that moment, it’s tempting to keep your gift to yourself.  Gifts are for giving!  If you hold back, no one will have the pleasure of experiencing what you have to offer and you’ll rob yourself of a potential sense of fulfillment.

The best time to give is when you’d rather withhold.  However, be sure to connect with your sincere desire to give; only give if you really mean it.  Do it because you can, because you want to.  Don’t do it out of obligation or a sense of “have to.”  The receiver will feel this lack of heart.  Practice digging deep to draw from your wellspring of willingness, of giving out of compassion, kindness, love.  Nothing can match a gift from the heart.

Assuredly you will be faced with a multitude of choices today, tomorrow, next week--to close or open, to love or hide, to give for the sake of giving or withhold.  You were born for greatness, and heart-felt offerings allow you to truly soar.

close window