USA
2002: A Society of Over-Schedulers
June 2002
This seems to be a trend these days, so I thought it might
apply to some of you too . . .
A Typical Day
When did this begin, the habit of cramming our day so full
that we no longer have time to sit on the porch to people-watch
or read a book? It has become a life of “have to’s”
— “I have to mow the lawn, I have to get that
report done.” Where has the choice gone?
Many Americans get up in the morning, down a super-size double
latte and are off and running. Breakfast? Maybe. Read a book?
Sit in the sunshine? Doubtful. From there it’s off to
work or school (yes, kids are overscheduled too!) and pack
the day full with just enough time between appointments to
be on time or slightly late. Lunch? Maybe. Fast food? Probably.
Then the afternoon “crash” hits, 3 or 4PM and
it’s time for candy or coffee . . . medication to get
through the rest of the day. Meetings, pick up kids, or more
appointments and BOOM! Dinner time. Nothing prepared because
you were too busy? Very likely. What will you eat?
Familiar? Why exactly are we doing this? Why are we so opposed
to taking time for ourselves? Don’t we deserve it?
Stop the Madness
What do you want? Take a few minutes to identify your key
priorities and what brings you joy. Expand your list of priorities
to contain details (i.e. Health: eliminate fatigue, workout
3 times a week, eat vegetables every day, etc.). Get specific.
Making Choices Instead of “Have To’s”
Evaluate how your priorities compare to your current life,
and start trimming away the things that don’t support
your priorities and are just a time drain. Communicate with
people in your life that you are making some changes and may
be less available for a while as you sort it out. Raising
your consciousness that everything is a choice is a great
step.
New Boundaries
If your boss comes in at 4pm hands you a 3-hour project and
says, “I need it by 8am tomorrow.” What do you
say? (You are paid salary to work from 8am to 5pm but you
didn’t really have anything planned tonight…)
It is your choice. You may feel you need to say “yes”
or you may feel you need to set some boundaries. How about
“I can get you this project by noon tomorrow. I am still
completing an important job now but can start yours first
thing in the morning.” Not really saying “no”
but regaining a bit of control over your destiny while communicating
your limitations and what is and is not okay. If you are working
with a boss to whom this is unacceptable, do you really want
to be there? You are human aren’t you? (This of course
can also apply to friends and family with high expectations.)
Start slowly, but start creating life in your terms or terms
that work for everyone.
Imagine what it would be like to get up in the morning, sit
at the kitchen table and read an article or a few pages of
an inspiring book — whatever sounds relaxing to you.
How it would be to eat a healthy breakfast that keeps you
energized all morning, enjoying a mid-morning snack, schedule
hourly 5-minute breaks to get out of your chair and away from
your computer? Imagine taking an hour for lunch (NOT AT YOUR
DESK!) to actually taste your food, connect with people, let
the stress fall away, maybe go for a walk . . . you get the
idea. Your day can be like this if you choose to set it up
this way.
PARENTS: Clearly
if you are a parent of young children this image may sound
hilariously impossible, but see what your version would look
like. Help each other to find time or ask for help from a
friend to have some time to yourself or together where you
can just be you and not “mom” or “wife”.
It’s Up To You
No one is going to do this for you.
You can wait and wait until a crisis forces you to change
the way you are living (heart attack, failing relationships,
anger, disconnection from your self, your spirit). Or, you
can make a decision to step off the fast track and enjoy your
life. What’s it worth to you?
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